|[APPLE]|

I didnt think i would feel like this again. like a deep knot inside me...

today my brother told me my dad finally filed for a divorce with my mum. and he apparently desires assets hat belongs to my mum how that even works i don't know.. and even if my mum gets the house, things are not the same..

its not so much a problem solution thing for me. for i always thought i was cured from my family problem when i was J1, its not true, i was better with pearlyn.

and today when the news hit me i kept thinking of pearlyn. how i used to throw anger at my mum on her.. and how i really realy did not treasure her.

and i let her go.

and when the news came today my first instinct was to look for her. and i look at that picture i never took down, i know. i know.

and just when i thought my life went back to the trivialities of studies and work, it turns out my life is still a mess... a big fucking mess.. and my only buoy, my only lighthouse, i let her go.

i didnt think i would feel like this again, like a deep knot inside me.

posted by Apple Bapok

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Hi, welcome to my blog, a place i don't visit often, but i know is there. a place i wish i had more time for. and everytime i come, i leave big parts of myself here. so if you want to know more about me, you've come to the right place.. cheers ^-^

{wishlist}

To get first class honours in LIT.

spend time with my mummy.

Fall in love.

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